The Transfiguration (B)

And he was transfigured before them ( Mk 9:2-10)

On Mount Tabor the three apostles had a religious experience. Could we call it a mystical experience? Whatever the name we might call it, it was an experience of the divine, an experience of God.

Ninoy Aquino had such an experience. Let a newspaperwoman (Rita Ledesma) relate to you what Ninoy told her.

He (Ninoy) turned to me, and I saw a soft smile lighting up his face. "I'm so glad to know you," he said. "I can talk to you about my soul. We can speak of my inner journey. You would appreciate that. I've been trying to converse with anyone about how I met God, how I commune with Him. But no one hears my longing. No one believes that I'm more than just a political animal."

"I know how it feels to meet God," I said.

But he didn't seem to notice that I had spoken, so eager was he to express himself. Words spilled out of him like water from a pipe that had burst wide open.

"When I was in (Fort) Bonifacio, I lived in a box," Ninoy said. "Well, that's what it felt like. There was an opening with bars, supposed to be a window, just big enough for me to get some air.

"It was my connection to the outside. But it was high, and there was this sheet of ply-wood, so I could only see a bit of the sky. I used to look out and try to learn its language. A hint of dawn, and I'd sense the kind of day it was going to be. Every dusk was different, every passing cloud. Try this: Look at the sky. What's it saying to you?"

Before I had time to reflect and reply, he continued: "After a while, I was able to discern the sounds around me -- the rustle of leaves when a storm was brewing, who were speaking, which guard was walking past my room.

"You become extremely sensitive when you're alone. I was there a long time, you know."

It began to drizzle. "This kind of rain always reminds me of home," he mused.

His voice suddenly playful, he said: "I can't mention this to just anyone. Maybe 10 years after I'm gone, you can tell your friends. By then, who'd care?"

A slight pause, and then he confided: "I had a pet in my room. Yeah, a pet! He was all mine, the guards couldn't even touch him. I used to talk to him about God. We had profound conversations. Gosh, we had great times together!"

He laughed, and it was delightful to see him so happy.

"Know what?" he said. "My pet was a mouse!"

I shrieked.

"Listen," Ninoy said, recalling how it began. "One night I saw this dark gray mouse running around. Then he disappeared under the door. A few days later he came back. I was really fascinated -- part of my curious nature.

"Anyway, I decided to experiment and left some food in a corner. When he came again I didn't move. I watched him eat. I did this several times. One day I sat very close to him, and he didn't wriggle away. He continued eating. So I tamed him until I was able to keep him still and talk to him."

He chuckled and shook his head. "Now, how can I tell this to anyone?" he demanded. "'Nasira na talaga si Ninoy (He's gone nuts).' I can hear it."

"You must have reinvented yourself in prison," I said. "Great men do. Maybe you didn't even know how strong you were."

He was adamant: "My strength came from God. No other way."

"Let me tell you something else," he said, switching gears. "For a time I was moved to Fort Magsaysay in Nueva Ecija. I felt degraded there, like I was a real prisoner. My family would visit and there was barbed wire between us.

"My cell didn't have a bathroom. If I wanted to take a shower or use the toilet, I had to signal the guards to let me out. Sometimes they were cruel and wouldn't open the door."

"Oh, my God," I gasped, "how humiliating."

"Anong (What do you mean) humiliating?" he said. "There came a point when I was nothing. I had nothing, not even humiliation. I remember coming back to my room one night after being watched in the toilet, and feeling so small. I had become a non-person. Wala na, tapos na (It was over). I had no dignity left."

"All of a sudden," Ninoy said, "like a miracle I felt free. Liberated from this shell of a body. Released from my prison, from Marcos, from everything that had ever held me hostage.

"It was my Pentecost. I met God and experienced His power. I felt the descent of grace they talk about, and I became a different man."